Junk Mail
by sasuukeh
Summary: Maybe Kairi was right. Her mailman is crazy. Crazy with a capital 'C' apparently. —rokunami; oneshot.


Naminé always hated her everlasting amount of random ads in her mailbox.

As if an eternity had been passing by, a delicate scowl marred her pale face, the morning sunshine plastering its rays at her golden tresses. Fragile hands flippantly went through each piece of new 'mail' she received on this fine Saturday morning, cobalt eyes looking increasingly mundane each fleeting second.

 _An ad for paopu fruit merchandise, an ad for a trip to Destiny Islands, an ad for finding your soulmate in which 'your destinies intertwine' like fate, an ad for seasalt ice cream, and bills._

Fun.

It didn't help that the mailman left her with a sheepish smile before hastily scurrying away to, she assumed, to drop off more unnecessary ads at another unfortunate victim's house.

That morning, she tossed more than half of her junk mail into the trash bin without a shred of mercy.

* * *

 _junk mail_

• roxas/naminé •

* * *

Sunshine was fully blasted into groggy lapis eyes when she felt herself getting pelted by a pillow. She thought she was living alone, so why the-

"Nami, wake up! It's only seven in the morning! Plenty of time to enjoy today and sunshine!"

The blonde had forgotten that her best friend was having a sleepover at her house last night. With all the pillow fights (started by her _beloved_ sister) and movie marathons when prompted, sleep had been a rarity in the house. If it was any other day besides the weekend, she would've woken up as an optimistic young woman ready to take on the world.

But today was Sunday.

Naminé buried herself in her dozen comfy blankets, quite adamant on being a human burrito. "Go away, Kai! It's been a long week…" Face pressed against her pillow, a yawn was stifled into its surface as she clutched her pillow languidly.

Kairi waved a nonchalant hand in the air, not even the slightest fazed. Trust Naminé to demand sleep on a Sunday as if she _totally_ didn't slept till two o'clock in the afternoon the previous weekend. That had been a rather ridiculous day. Kairi concluded that Sora's lazy bum syndrome rubbed off on her best friend before she gave her sister another whack. "C'mon, I don't want to have breakfast all by myself. I need to meet up with Sora later, remember?"

"Of course, I didn't forget," muttered an irritable Naminé, who looked ready to tackle the next person she sees besides Kairi. The redhead always had the better agility of the two. "You're twenty-one and yet you don't want to have breakfast alone?"

A blush was used in response, embarrassment marring her voice. "That's because I always eat with Sora…" She coughed deliberately, trying to save some of her wounded dignity. "Anyways, let's go! You know how I'm weak for your strawberry pancakes, Nami!"

Before slinking out the room, Kairi's gaze flickered over her shoulder. "By the way, I think your mailman's a little crazy," she insisted, a rather mundane facial expression plastered on her face.

Naminé blinked, unable to even process so much with a sleepy brain. What could her sister mean by that…?

* * *

A bewildered Naminé stood in front of her mailbox, her cerulean eyes observing how her mailman was busy having a showdown with her mailbox. From solely observations alone, the storm brewing in his eyes meant serious business.

"I can't believe this!" he murmured embarrassingly before trying to shove the stack of papers in that accursed mailbox. "Stop being so difficult!"

She had no idea what's going on, but she was heavily amused. It wasn't everyday your mailman shouts angry remarks at your mailbox.

"I told them I was on my break," he complained to himself, so engrossed in recalling his morning to even notice his spectator, "but did they listen? Of course not!"

Maybe Kairi was right. Her mailman is crazy. Crazy with a capital 'C' apparently.

"Axel snuck out of work, Demyx kept whining, Larxene kept pissing everyone off. But what about me?" he furiously ranted, aggressively trying to press Naminé's stack of mail together with hopes that it'll be skinny enough to fit through.

It didn't.

And he kept ranting, unaware of his surroundings or the girl he was unknowingly embarrassing himself to.

"They just roped me into it without my thoughts being brought into consideration! ' _Roxas, if you take over my shift this week, I'll buy you seasalt ice cream for two weeks! Promise!'_ Psh, like Axel would even remember that!"

Naminé decided this Axel guy was _stellar_.

"Then Xion just _had_ to go on this family vacation to who-knows-where." He tried to separate the stack into two, shuffling one half inside successfully before shoving in the other half. It got caught by the mailbox. Joy. "Of course I would lose my only _sane_ talking buddy on the day I get double shifts!"

She was starting to wonder what kind of crazy mail business he was working with.

"To top it off, Hayner had that stupid struggle match to watch and Olette went with him, and Pence is too busy in his _Picture Taking Wonderland_ to lend a helping hand!" Roxas sardonically ground before he gave a futile push again with the stack of mail.

Clearly, all his friends were too busy for him and he was in a stormy mood, but Naminé warily eyed his clenched fists.

"Who designed mailboxes to be this small anyways?! I told Saïx to toss away the junk mail since I'm pretty sure _no one_ reads them-" Naminé couldn't help but agree. "-but no! He insists that every piece of mail is _mutually of the same level of importance_! Thanks Saïx because this stack of mail is so important that it _won't fit in the mailbox_."

She had no idea a person, much less a _mailman_ , can get so angry at 7:20 in the morning.

"I'm starting to think someone mailed away Saïx's brain…" her enraged mailman muttered before exhaling soothingly. "I'm also gonna mortally wound Axel for mentioning _her_ too-"

It's probably time to step in before she winds up with a demolished mailbox and burnt mail. "U-Um, pardon me…" She took a tiny step forward, the coffee she downed earlier taking effect.

He abruptly stopped, hands frozen as they held her mail. She noted how mechanically he craned his neck to her. "Hi," he tried to say casually as if she didn't just witnessed his ten minute rampage, "This… is not what it looks like."

"The most logical thing to assume after that show is that you are attacking my mailbox." She crossed her arms over her chest nonchalantly. Had she not drank her coffee earlier, the neighboorhood would be witnessing her screaming.

"Er… How long were you standing there…?" An embarrassed, mortified blush tainted his face.

"Ever since you said 'I can't believe this!' which was also the very beginning of your rage."

She had never seen someone once so angry become so shy. "Then yes, I was… indeed attacking your mailbox…" She gave him props for not blatantly lying in her face. Straight to the point; she liked that.

Naminé waved a hand dismissively, reassurace accompanying her docile voice, "It's okay, Roxas. We all have bad days once in awhile."

Roxas seemed stunned. "How did you know my name, Naminé?"

"You said your name somewhere along in your rant." The blonde has shrugged, and she could practically hear Kairi shouting at her to hurry up from inside her house. "I'd ask the same, but I remembered that you're my mailman." _And not some mailbox hating psycho._

He looked as if he actually forgot he was holding her mail for awhile, and he gave her a sheepish grin before handing the stack over to her. Roxas habitually placed a hand behind his neck, somewhat awkwardly replying, "I suppose you're gonna toss half of it out, right?"

She flipped through them calmly, making mental notes of what to toss out. "Of course. The recycling center would be happy."

"You like preserving the environment?" he conversationally piped in.

"I was big on it during high school." Naminé responded whimsically before setting her gaze on his truck. "Shouldn't you be working? Double shifts, remember?"

"Dang, your memory's good," he momentarily breathed, "I'm sure people could understand late mail, especially when I have the pleasure of talking to a pretty girl."

She never got the chance to respond once an eerily familiar voice intercepted, "Roxas, why are you _flirting_ with my sister?"

Naminé observed as his eyes dilated and blinked. "Kairi…?" He spoke her name in a way that Naminé thought sounded mortified.

"The one and only, thank you very much." The redhead in question mockingly bowed, readjusting her pink blouse.

"Why are you here?" Naminé felt herself butt in wearily, a free hand rubbing her temple.

"You took forever with the mail, so I came to join the party. I just didn't realize what kind of party this is." The redhead eyed the two dubiously, hands on her hips. Her innocent younger sister with her longtime high school friend _and_ brother to her fiance with a slightly banged up mailbox and crumpled stack of mail. Obviously, there was something amiss in Kairi's perspective. "This looks… scandalous."

Naminé took it upon herself to brush past the two while continuously flipping through her mail. "The only thing scandalous here is him threatening my mailbox."

As Naminé shut her door, Roxas and Kairi exchanged glances before the former started to get creeped out.

"Kairi, don't look at me like that." Roxas adverted his eyes sqeamishly.

Kairi merely took her sweet time relishing the awkwardness she stimulated. "...Obviously, you can never get the girls at this rate."

"...I don't need to hear this."

"Whipped," she adamantly stated, obnoxiously popping the ending.

"Please pass a message to Sora that his fiance is a lunatic."

Kairi almost snorted. "Please tell Sora that his brother is the _true lunatic_ who likes to wreck mailboxes of girls he likes, and can't pass messages himself despite his occupation as a mailman."

"I hate you."

"I love you too, Roxy." He groaned in displeasure, scowling when she casually patted his cheek twice.

* * *

Next morning, Naminé woke up to the sound of tires screeching. To anyone else, they would've brushed it off and continue sleeping, but she decided to get her mail. Unceremoniously doing things in the wrong time seemed to be a habit in the family, she and Kairi being prime examples.

Kairi had drove back to the house she shared with her fiance ("That wedding isn't going to plan itself, y'know!"), leaving her sister to relish the rare tranquility of her empty home. She began stretching as she contently walked outside, lazily yawning and not even fazed to see Roxas battling with her mailbox again.

"Is this going to be a daily routine now?"

He wisely ignored that inquiry. "Hey," he grunted a greeting briefly, not even looking up, "Naminé. Since you're up, you just saved your mailbox from round two. Here you go." He slipped all the mail into her grasp, more than exuberant to ditch the mailbox as his grin was evident to that.

"Like you could've won round two," she spoke sagely as if it was a great piece of wisdom.

"Hey! These arms don't have muscles for nothing!"

"Tell that to yourself yesterday."

He pouted before walking back to his truck, in which she had to question if he really the same age she was. "Be sure to check your mail thoroughly today, okay? It could be something important."

His engine started, and off he went before she could reply.

* * *

On her table lied a pile of junk mail, nothing seemingly out of place. It was just a bunch of ads as usual. Trying to follow what he told her earlier, she warily shifted through the stack.

She couldn't comprehend what he wanted her to do until she finally found an ad promoting the beaches of Destiny Island.

A sticky note was slapped on top of it in messy handwriting, probably from Roxas.

' _Clue One!'_ was all it contained. She flipped it front and back, but it didn't seem like he had another ulterior motive behind the note. On the ad, she found the words ' _let's go!'_ circled in red marker ink.

So now he had the gall to make it a game for her?

Naminé exhaled, rummaging the pile for the second one, hoping he didn't split it into hundreds of parts. A girl can only handle so much. She couldn't handle her own mailman and his games! How preposterous that would sound!

Immediately ripping the clue two sticky note off a promotion for a theme park, she scoured the paper whilst she sipped her coffee. There weren't much words on it, therefore, she almost missed the circle he actually placed around a couple holding hands among the crowd of people.

Hoping he's not hinting something, she tilted her head. It's just a regular couple, smiling and trying to have fun. Was this what he meant? To have fun? It seemed to the only logical choice; she'd tread carefully with it.

With this answer, both clues make sense when put together. _Let's go have fun!_

With high hopes, Naminé scoured for clue three, pulling out random ads promoting random weapons and tourist spots. She kept searching with eyes of a hawk, ultimately slapping a brochure for a tour around Atlantica on her table.

' _Clue Three!'_

She squinted at the tiny words along the bottom margin.

' _Just two more parts to go!'_

Naminé officially deemed her mailman to be insane, not crazy. He's wasting sticky notes and killing trees too. Therefore, he's also a menace to nature.

He'd circled a random spot on the front page, which exhibited the ocean. She stared confusedly. Did he want to go to the ocean…? Explore a beach? He likes the color blue? Maybe the next clue would help?

Her hands pushed aside the brochure and pulled out a piece of junk mail showcasing pens. Clue Four was in the shape of a dark, antique pen.

 _A fountain pen_ , she mused contemplatively, a delicate finger tapping her chin. A pen and the ocean?

He wanted to write near the ocean? Write _about_ the ocean? Record details about the sea? Or maybe he wanted to go swimming?

While Roxas seemed like a very literal person, one should not judge a book by its cover. Thus, she began to think more with symbolism behind the meanings.

The ocean; he had only circled a random spot, a selection with no sea critter or anything. He must have meant water.

A pen; the actual pen he circled was very nice, they were great to use. Although she thought about what nice quality lines of ink a pen like that could make, Roxas was probably not an art person.

So, she took back what she said and thought quite literally for the pen.

"Let's go to the… fountain together?" she tried to piece together, her befuddled murmur echoing to herself.

Clue Five came in the shape of a clock, the hands pointing at 2:15 in the afternoon on an ad about clock repairing.

Naminé gazed thoughtfully, suddenly finding this whole game to be simplistic.

"Let's meet at the fountain together at 2:15 today…" she whispered the final answer, instantaneously rushing to her room for a change of clothes.

The clock on her wall said 1:50pm.

* * *

By the time she got there, she was panting in her dress, cardigan, and summer sandals. He was there, in casual wear, which she couldn't help but notice. He'd been grinning at her, a friendly hand waving.

"I thought it'd be hard to solve, but Kairi said you were a clever girl."

She'll personally interrogate Kairi later. "Well, it did stump me at first, but it was actually very easy." Naminé brushed back a loose strand of flaxen hair.

Roxas shoved his hands in his pockets, goodheartedly beginning, "I was just gonna ask you face to face, but where would be the fun in that?"

"Get to the point," she interjected, inwardly pouting that she spent so much time on this trivial matter. "Did you need me for something?"

Never hearing it before until now, she thought his chuckle was melodious. She's had her fair share of crushes before, but he did indeed seem to have a charm to him that enchanted her. However, a crush was just a crush; she'll probably get over it soon. So, she decided to act normally as if nothing went wrong as she listened.

He took an envelope from his pocket, offering it. She took it, regarding it with silent inquisitiveness. "That's your invitation to Sora and Kairi's wedding. Kairi told me to give it to you since she left in a hurry this morning."

"You couldn't have slipped it in my mailbox?"

"Your mailbox hates my very presence. Besides," he momentarily winked, "where would be the fun in that?"

Despite the situation, she smiled whimsically, playfully rolling her eyes.

"Sooo," Roxas lightly started after a few seconds of silence, "Since we're already here, how about we go to that amusement park that just opened up near here?"

Naminé's eyebrow began to arc as she slipped her invitation in her pocket.

"I'm saying this because," his voice was lowered to a mere amused whisper as he slightly leaned forward, "Sora and Kairi are conspiring in the bushes behind us." His cheerful eyes never left hers.

"My goodness." She couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed at his reasoning. "Should we put up a show for them?" she attempted to teasingly play along, trying so hard to not glare at the bushes where red hair and brown hair was seen poking through.

"We should!" Roxas took the time to chuckle, but his laughter died down when he tried to seriously meet her eyes. "But seriously, Naminé, I'd appreciate it if you do come with me. From what I've been told, you seem like a very remarkable girl that I'd like to get to know better, and seeing how we have an opportunity right now, we shouldn't waste that, right?"

She was trying _so damn hard_ to resist the charm of those sincere eyes. "I…" He seemed like such a gentleman right now; really nice and kindhearted. She's given her heart to so many, but maybe, she could try branching out one more time…? If Kairi and Sora knew him, he couldn't be that bad. Those two always knew their right from wrong. "Sure, I'd like that, Roxas!"

Beaming at her bashful acceptance, he offered an arm. "Shall we?"

"Let's." Smiling with grace, her arm was looped with his.

For a mailman, he was pretty charming. Naminé was definitely okay with that.


End file.
